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Friday, August 14th, 2009
8:49 am
when i woke up today, this sentence was in my head, as though i'd been narrating a story in my sleep:

"lee roberts revived his shoulder-length mullet from 1985 and dubbed it The Wave."


(1 rasputin | change your mind)

Monday, July 6th, 2009
4:06 pm

today i went to work incredibly hungover. 

it's true that  during any lunch shift at just about any restaurant, at least 90% of the staff is in recovery from various activities that occurred the night before. while serving tables and heinous partying seem to go hand in hand,  i've avoided falling back into the waiter lifestyle for the most part. still, i went out to see eric's band play last night, and the whiskey got me.

our special today included fish, and a few of my tables asked for malt vinegar, which smells like garbage water. my shift was basically very uncool. i cannot wait for school to start again so i can put off making an honest living for awhile longer.

on another note:
does anyone have any thoughts on the ethics of writing about people that actually exist with intent to publish? i'm not planning a tell-all or anything... just throwing some ideas around. portraits would be loving and respectful, though honest (its the honesty part i'm curious about).


(5 rasputins | change your mind)

Sunday, June 28th, 2009
12:24 am
i may have a writing job, thanks to last semester's media writing professor, who tracked me down at the sports bar where i currently work to tell me that the possible internship i'd long forgotten about had become a paying project. he appeared like an angel to pull me out of my fried-food depths of despair. we'd discussed the internship often toward the end of the semester, but two of his family members died during finals week  i figured i'd leave the ball in his court. two months later, he shows up out of nowhere- the fairy godmother to my cinderella. 

it's not perfect-  i'll still have to serve some tables, but not as often.  i'm okay with the slight improvement. it's better than taking orders from snotty brentwood jerks six days a week.

(1 rasputin | change your mind)

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009
4:19 pm
wow i haven't changed my lj profile since i was a 19-year-old, except to add "making out topless" and "girls on the porch" to my list of interests during a period in which i was staying with sandy and stacey and the three of us posted entries (directed mostly to each other) at least twice a day.

i'm still interested in being southern, being crafty, and david bowie, but i haven't watched sifl and olly in at least 5 years. also, i'm still fond of sam rockwell and christopher walken, but not enough to call them interests.

so i'm editing.

(5 rasputins | change your mind)

Monday, May 11th, 2009
3:14 pm
why didn't anyone tell me about pride and prejudice and zombies?!?

(8 rasputins | change your mind)

Thursday, April 30th, 2009
1:23 am
crap! i ran out of free 90210 on netflix.

what the hell am i going to do?

(3 rasputins | change your mind)

Wednesday, April 29th, 2009
4:10 pm
okay so i was just watching Oprah before i have to go back to work (split shift, hooray!)

and this woman who works at the bunny ranch (who was very charming, intelligent, and well-spoken), was talking about a customer who

1. was a single man
2. who paid her to pretend to be his nagging wife and
3. paid other prosttitutes to be his "mistresses"

she said he specified that he wanted her to act jealous, and that he had never been married.  he said he had spent 30 years listening to coworkers bicth about their wives and it made him feel left out.

no offense, y'all, but men are fucking weird. do you want a wife or not???? shit.

(2 rasputins | change your mind)

Thursday, April 23rd, 2009
12:41 pm

i skipped my first class to sleep in a bit, but now i'm caught up watching millionaire because bill nye is a guest expert. some dumb bitch used him to answer a question about teletubbies (she was a kindergarten teacher, by the way). He was like, "seriously?" but answered the question correctly anyway. then she got asked the name of the most prestigious math award given every four years, and she had to walk away.

i mean, damn. don't use bill nye for the stupid shit. it's bill nye the science guy. you know he knew the answer to the math question. what a waste.

(1 rasputin | change your mind)

Wednesday, April 22nd, 2009
7:36 pm - i'll tell you what's up
i don't know if you guys noticed, but i share a birthday with thomas paine. i take this as a good sign.

what if i believed i was paine reincarnated and made decrees all the time and wore pantaloons?
would you still be my friend?

(4 rasputins | change your mind)

7:21 pm - miniature missionaries
at around 5 PM today, 2 little boys knocked on my door to ask me if i knew if i would go to heaven if i died today.

okay now first of all, there were zero adults in sight. i don't care how nice a neighborhood is- you don't send your ten-year-old out to knock on a stranger's door. it's a good thing i'm not john wayne gacey. second, they were inviting me to their baptist church when there is a baptist church- i'm not shitting you- 3 houses down from us.

so here are these little white boys dressed like they just came from golf at the country club, trying to tell people in a predominantly black neighborhood (with a church included) to come to their church. what a bunch of fucking lunatics.

they were very well-mannered and sweet so i said, "i don't want to hurt your feelings honey, but i don't talk about my religious beliefs with strangers."  i felt like saying "wow your parents are real bastards for sending you to do their dirty work," but CLEARLY these kids have enough bullshit to deal with already so i sent them on their way. it's hard to get  a kid who's been brainwashed his whole life to start thinking until he hits at least 12-13. that's when the real questions come.

anyway, these people will recieve a harsh "wtf is wrong with you?" e-mail from me.

(3 rasputins | change your mind)

Thursday, April 16th, 2009
11:20 pm
i wish there were more journalists like chuck klosterman and hunter thompson.

i'm obsessed with the idea of objectivity, but i like these guys because they inject personal perspective into their stories.

HOWEVER- i think they are (were) so good at this because they are both self-aware. they understand that the world doesn't see through their eyes, and they are comfortable being just another figure in the story. 

people who try to slide their beliefs in with presentation of the facts make me uncomfortable because they have no concept of an outside perspective. i understand that objective journalists are necessary, but they're becoming obsolete anyway.  we're back to crusading journalism- selling sensational stories for entertainment's sake and trying to sway public opinion.

if we're going to throw objectivity out the window, then we might as well acknowlege it and make things interesting.

(1 rasputin | change your mind)

Wednesday, April 15th, 2009
7:25 pm
metro water services is cutting off our water friday if we don't pay our bill, which is 4x the normal amount due to a leak (outside). who has $190 to pay a bill that is not actually owed?

(4 rasputins | change your mind)

Tuesday, April 14th, 2009
11:54 pm - weird times in tornado town

the whole murfreesboro/nashville area seems tense right now. could be because of all the clouds still looming overhead, i guess. i hate driving to school when it's overcast because i'm afraid that a tornado will come along and suck maybelle out of the house while i'm stuck at frikkin mtsu with people i care about alot less than i care about my dog (baby).

other worries:

i cannot afford a haircut. i have not had one in 6(ish) months. my hair is scraggsville, and i refuse to go this stupid wedding unless i look beautiful. i'm not getting all dressed up and standing next to pretty boy brandon with trailer hair on my head.

also, i can't afford to buy chicken. how is it that i work all the time, yet i can't afford chicken? i did come across a rotisserie manager's special for 2.49 yesterday (the self-checkout lane was deserted so i busted out my change purse and saved my precious $4 of paper money. this is my favorite broke trick- it saves you the cost of one of those coin collecting machines that charge you 10%). i have gotten 3 meals out of it so far. sweet deal. anyway, i'm back to working ramen into my meal plan.

actually that's about it as far as worries go. money money money. but its a big worry. these utilities were fucked up this month: electric (we're disputing november and december's $600+ bills), gas (they never processed our request to move the account into our name so they sent someone out to shut it off), and water (a leak under the house resulted in a $400 dollar bill and plumbers digging up our front yard today). also, our cable modem died on us and we went without internet for a few days until comcast could come out to replace it. this is all BULLSHIT.

so right now i am terrified to spend money because i don't know what the hell is going to go wrong next- although it doesn't really matter whether or not i am in the mood to spend, as i do not have the money to begin with. hopefully work will be busy tomorrow and rich folks in brentwood will be all about forking over a tiny portion of their vast sums of money so that i can live a semi-decent adult life with regular hygiene and grocery trips that don't revolve around salted carbs in a bag.

(3 rasputins | change your mind)

Thursday, April 2nd, 2009
1:30 pm - Writer's Block: Prison Food is Punishment Enough
What food would you miss most if you were sent to prison for the rest of your life?
chinese food
sweet tea
sammiches- of the turkey, grilled cheese, and pb&j variety
pad thai

(1 rasputin | change your mind)

Friday, March 27th, 2009
4:38 pm - beverly hills
i've been completely sucked into old school 90210 (brandon: "you need to quit watching that shit").

in the third episode, entitled "the first time" brandon walsh loses his virginity to his crazy sort-of ex who is visiting from home. she is all about the beverly hills lifestyle, and gets drunk and hits on his best friend (luke perry, who was my favorite) before confessing that she actually lost her virginity to someone else. and that she ran away from home. mom has a nervous breakdown about her son having sex, and dad and brenda are all smiles about it. in my memory, sitcoms were always very serious about teens losing their virginity back then, but apparently not. everyone but mom seems to think its no big deal. dad seems sort of smug about it.

in a later episode, brandon seems to consider dating the smart girl, but is  intimidated by her integrity and intelligence. the early episodes keep hinting that these two will get together (which makes sense, as brandon is always being painted as this smart good guy who rises above the shallow interests of other beverly hills teens), but if i remember correctly, he ends up dating vapid blond kelly. i'm guessing the kids who watched the show were hoping for such an pairing, but i always identified with the less-than-hot newspaper-editing four eyes. later in the series, i think they give her a hopeless crush on brandon, which is sad.

also, on a (more) ridiculous note- although i remembered kelly's mom being an alcoholic, i did not recall her cocaine freakout at the mother-daughter fashion show in episode 7 (entitled "the perfect mom"). kelly's mom is a leathery skeletor, but everyone keeps talking about her like she's superhot and glamorous. i guess milfs were a little different in the early 90's.

(2 rasputins | change your mind)

Tuesday, March 17th, 2009
9:28 pm - A Hero Comes to Town
chuck klosterman came to visit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

murfreesboro, not me. i was walking to my midterm, thinking about how boring my day was going to be, when i spotted a poster bearing a familiar face. it said "chuck klosterman:life through the prism of pop culture" and the room number. i had to read it twice, because i couldn't believe it.

but it was true. i saw him. and he was glorious. i was kind of worried that he would be this really anxious wreck who was completely unfunny in person, but he was hilarious and seemed comfortable in front of one of the biggest lecture classrooms at MTSU (with three rows of people lining the floor in front because there were no more seats).

he talked about his transition from college to current career. he repeated again and again that he believed chance to be the biggest factor in success, but that a person had to be prepared and equipped with the proper tools for a golden opportunity, should it suddenly arise. basically, you should be good at whatever it is you want to do so that if someone asks you, you can say, "why sure! i can do that."

he went on many funny tangents, but always brought the lecture back to the original topic. when asked if he would list some bands he hated, he laughed and said, "well let me ask you a question. why do you want to know?" the kid replied that he wanted to hear chuck trash talk someone. so he listed tv on the radio ("it's like a pop song with a really horrible buzzing noise underneath") and red hot chili peppers

he told a story about two fans who took some acid while waiting for his reading to begin and said that he mostly wrote very late at night. he also said that printing his phone number in the intro to fargo rock city got him an opening spot at a david byrne reading.

anyway, it was certainly one of the best lectures i've been to, if only because i could relate to the guy and really understood everything he was talking about. i guess reading all of his books didn't hurt. i wish you guys could have been there.

in a (sort of) unrelated note, i've been watching the first season of 90210. if you haven't seen it lately, you should watch the first episode. it's a lot weirder than i remember. brenda dates a 25-year-old who has no idea she's 16, and she can't understand why he's pissed when she tells the truth. everybody keeps talking about how kelly spent "a fortune" on a white tank-and-denim ensemble. steve sports his trademark blonde fro, a navy blazer, a white polo tucked into belted khaki shorts, and white reeboks with white socks for 2/3 of the episode. there's a slow motion dance at the beginning that is reminiscent of the fly girls or bel biv devoe. brian austen green talks about "outrageous babes" and when brenda stumbles out of a strange man's car in the middle of the night crying, even though she's supposed to be with her female friends, her mom doesn't ask questions. brenda and kelly forge a fake id in the middle of chemistry class, and glamorous LA mullets dominate the male population.

i'm just saying- watch it.

(5 rasputins | change your mind)

Friday, March 13th, 2009
4:11 pm - Writer's Block: Really, Truly
Do you believe in true love? What about love at first sight?

1. yes, because i believe that love exists and i don't think placing the word "true" in front of it changes the word "love" at all (what does that even mean?!?! think about it.) i think love is "true" (loyal, intense, honest, pure) by nature, and the phrase "true love" is a little redundant. i guess what i'm saying is that if love is not true, then it's not love at all.

2. not exactly. but i will say that in each of the three major relationships i've had, i knew immediately when i first met each guy that they were going to be a big deal in my life. sometimes when you meet someone you feel like you just got the wind knocked out of you, and then they make your life crazy for three years. it might not be love at first sight, but it's something.

(7 rasputins | change your mind)

Wednesday, February 25th, 2009
6:38 pm - Writer's Block: Self-Indulgent
If you had to give up one indulgence for 40 days, what would it be?
booze. not so into it anymore.

(change your mind)

4:34 pm
today the doc drove me to murfreesboro to pick up my car- a chore he volunteered for. we listened to mariachi on the way and then i bought him lunch at fiesta acupulco. it was fun.

i'm definitely going to keep him as a friend because he's a good friend, and you can never have enough of those. i'm tired of hanging around with people who can't be bothered to contirbute. i know i've been saying that for like a year now, but it's my new thing.

(change your mind)

Tuesday, February 24th, 2009
11:58 pm - oh, i'm a believer.

Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.

-Thomas Jefferson

(2 rasputins | change your mind)

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